New Male swingers in Tenerife
Always remember the Number 1 rule in Swinging all over the world: no always means NO!
Anyone, male or female, even in the middle of sex, has the right to say "no" at anytime while swinging.
If anyone does not stop immediately then they are committing rape. News travels between clubs and party hosts and people who do not obey the rules will never be allowed to any swinging events again.
Single men have the hardest time breaking into the swinging scene. In every town in every country there are thousands of guys of all ages who want to get involved in the swinging lifestyle, most of them it must be said try to use swinging as it is often the easiest way to get sex without ending up married with a mortgage, 2.4 kids and a hefty overdraft!. There are also many men wanting to swing due to broken marriages or relationships, and then there are the many miss-fits; all too many guys have no social skills and find themselves unable to make friends through work or social gatherings, and then there are the ones who see themselves as gods gift to women, and as a result no woman wants to know them, and of course the ones who have not learnt to use a shower and put people off meeting them due to odour problems.
As a single man you will have to work hard to be chosen as a playmate by either a couple or a single lady.
Here are a few suggestions that may help you.
- Always be Honest
Don't exaggerate when describing your looks, your sexual ability, financial worth etc. If you are 30 say 30, if 50 say 50. Ladies are more interested in the real you than an age, but if they catch you lying about one thing, they will not trust you on anything else! If you are a married male or a "significant other" playing away from home, say so, pretending to be single but sneaking off to make phone calls, or having to rush off to beat a curfew is not going to fool anyone for very long.
- Keep your responses Relevant
When responding to an ad, make sure that you are what the advertiser says they are looking for in their profile. Don't respond to an ad asking for a 20 year old green eyed, blonde male if you are 45, gray hair and brown eyes - you will just frustrate the advertiser by clogging up their mail box.
- Keep your answer concise
Make your email response concise, but never use a one line response like "I want to shag you" Make sure that you fit the description of the person the advertiser is looking for, and reiterate the points where you fit the description.
Don't send them a 2 page essay outlining all your fantasies and experiences to date, you can talk about these in detail when you meet. Always remember that first impressions do count, be polite, open, and to the point without being blunt.
- Personal Grooming
If you are lucky and get an invitation to meet socially turn up smart and sweet smelling. An unshaven, guy in crumpled clothes and smelling of sweat is unlikely to get you to a second drink, let alone get you into the bedroom - unless the girl has specified that she is looking for a bit of smelly rough action. At the same time, don't wear the whole bottle of aftershave!. Dress appropriately for the venue you are meeting at, smart casual - clean pressed clothes- will see you through in most venues. Remember to shave, shower, clean your teeth and brush your hair.
If you are sending someone a photograph follow a few simple rules.
- Unless requested otherwise by the advertiser, send a face &/or body shot, don't use cock shots, girls look at eyes, hands, bums, legs and hair before they look at cocks. It may be your pride and joy, but an unasked for cock shot is more likely to lose you responses than gain them for you. If they do want to see your 9" monster they will ask.
- Always use a recent picture, you can only fool someone by sending them an old picture until you meet them. Just because you get them to meet you does not mean you will get any further if the picture was of someone else, or you 10 years ago.
- Put your profile name across the centre of the picture, this is to stop photo collectors, and to enable people to remember which photo goes with which profile.
- Meet with Couples
As a single male you are more likely to get action with a couple, than you are with a single girl. Don't worry, you will find that most of the guys in couples are straight, but they love to watch their wife with another guy/guys. You just clarify before the meet that a) there is a couple by talking on the telephone and b) asking outright if the guy is straight.
- Meet at a swingers Club or Party
There are parties running every weekend. Most are for couples only, some are for couples and guys or greedy girls and guys. It is a sad fact of life that 90% of the time you will be charged more as a single guy than the couples or girls will pay, this is down to supply and demand. Do not go to these parties looking for a one on one session with a girl, it is just not going to happen. If however you follow the rules of etiquette, you are almost guaranteed sex, as the girls who attend these parties like to have lots of men. You will find that most often it is the clubs that cater for single men rather than parties held by swingers in their homes. Before you go to a party make sure you read the etiquette section on this site. Swinging Etiquette.
- Meeting Single girls
If you see an ad from a single girl, read it carefully. If it looks to good to be true, it probably is. Lots of girls on all swingers sites are actually guys pretending to be girls who advertise trying to collect your pictures (see info about pictures above), others may be escorts trying to get you to call them, but of course most of them are real. Most single women are very choosy and make the approaches to guys they fancy, and unless your match their profile exactly they are likely to ignore you.
- Be Sober
When meeting couples or ladies or at a club or party, Don't get drunk, or try kissing the girl if you are stinking of beer. Take some breath fresh mints with you. Remember, although the girl is looking for some fun in the sack, she has many other guys to choose from. Whoever you are going to meet remember that although its scary, the other people will be as nervous as you. Don't get drugged up either. No once fancies people who are not in control of their faculties. A drink to steady the nerves is OK, bouncing off the walls and throwing up is not going to impress anyone.
If you respond to an ad and you get a turn down, don't harass the advertiser. Be graceful and accept that you may not fit the persons requirements. Sending dozens of mails asking for reasons or being abusive will not get you anywhere, and in many cases will mean that a warning goes around the community to avoid you.
- Never profess Love
Never fall in love with a swinger. Swinging is about having fun with other people. Most of these people are in happy relationships and are looking for sex, not love. Declaring your love for someone is going to complicate the issues, and put strains on everyone's relationships, you could even destroy the other persons marriage.
If you are looking for love check one of the many lonely hearts sites.
- First Date
Turn Up, On time, remember - You only have one chance to make a first impression - screw up the first meeting and you are history. You will be seen a as timewaster, and couples talk. If you make a good impression they will probably meet you again, they may share you with their friends, and take you to parties. Make a bad impression and the word will go around that you are no good, your chances of swinging will drop to zero. The swinging scene does not work on the adage "Treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen".